You can see why as we go on.Īs Miranda’s comment was thoroughly mocked by readers, others came to her defence. Imposters, of the online variety, were of actual concern. We know now that there was at least one Facebook page posing as Joey Tempest at that time. Now we also had Miranda, who was posing as Joey’s wife online. We had Carrieanne who said Joey Tempest was replaced by a satanic doppleganger in some bizarre conspiracy. Joey’s wife, incidentally, was also publicly known to be Lisa Worthington, not somebody named Miranda. On this page, she has poorly dubbed her vocals onto classic Europe ballads, to create fake “duets” with her “husband” Joey. I followed Miranda to her YouTube channel, where she goes by the name “TheMirandaTempest”. (I’m not sure what good a DNA report will do us.) Miranda claimed to have Joey Tempest’s birth certificate, marriage certificate, childrens’ birth certificates, and a DNA report. “Must post fast since I’m sure the guys in white coats coming for ya,” she said. Miranda, claiming to be Joey’s wife, also did not get the joke. We mocked Doreen a bit, but then shortly after, a new player entered the field. With lines such as “Joey would NEVER let his hair go flat like that, wake up people,” I really did think it was an obvious joke post. We laughed some more, as one person clearly did not get the joke. While everyone else seemed to get the joke, someone named Doreen, who typed completely in capslock, said: “ I know Joey Tempest, and can I assure you that this is completely and utterly ludicrous.” We guffawed and high-fived and hoped Carrieanne would drop another bizarre comment. Simpson was chased down – a definite clue that there was something more going on here than meets the eye! Why would Europe specifically reference that notorious highway unless they were implying some sort of wrongdoing behind the scenes?” The real Joey would never have written a song about ‘children of the night’, ‘California 405’ is the highway that O.J. For example, we wrote: “Just look at the songs here! ‘Children of the Night’. With co-writer 1537, we cooked up a parody review of War of Kings, playing up the whole replacement angle. Things got even weirder.Īdmittedly, this next part is kind of my fault. And just like with Queen Romana, acolytes of the weird soon emerged to talk about Joey Tempest. Tens of thousands of followers legitimately believe Didulo to be the legitimate Queen of Canada, as she tours the country in a beat up RV and feeds her followers tins of sardines. Canada already has a monarch and his name is Charles III, but I digress. I’m reminded of Romana Didulo, a woman who claims to be the “Queen of Canada”. You can’t help but see similarities to conspiracy theories today. Reader Derek commented, “I can see you made the mistake of spilling meth into your coffee this morning champ.” “Are you on drugs?” asked Jompa Wilmenius, of E-Tainment News. Carrieanne ties the lyrics to “Danger on the Track” and “The Final Countdown” to a prophecy of this great replacement, like biblical verse. There’s a really messianic angle to this whole comment. “You are worshipping the devil!!!” said Carrieanne. “The real Joey Tempest had to leave the group because of this horrible liar!! It’s so obvious and so clear to see that it’s just someone different (unless you’re blind and deaf, like bunch of ignorants ).” On and on it goes, a massive diatribe praising Joey, attacking the fans who enabled the replacement’s acceptance, and of course, religious weirdness. According to Carrieanne, “since the middle of 1989, the real Joey Tempest is not in this band, and Joey was truly the only one who has made this group huge with his talents, awesomeness and uniqueness!! And since 26 years, there’s such a horrible imposter and liar in this ‘group’, that’s not the real Joey Tempest!!”
You’d think there was nothing controversial about Tommy’s review, but on June 13 of that year…everything changed.Ī reader going by the name “Carrieanne” dropped a massive, monolithic comment one morning, explaining that Joey Tempest was no longer in fact Joey Tempest. He rated it 4/5 stars, and said “I praise Europe for giving us a true great hard rock record in 2015”.
“What conspiracy,” you ask? It all started in March of 2015 when a writer friend of mine, Tommy Morais, contributed an excellent review of the Europe album, War of Kings. I think with the distance of seven years, we can finally put the Joey Tempest Conspiracy Theory to bed. RECORD STORE TALES #1013: “Joey” – The Joey Tempest Conspiracy, 7 Years Later
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